If you grew up in the US and have a name like John, Bill, Sam, Joe, Mary, Heather, Patricia… then you might not relate to this post. I’m sorry, the next post should be more inclusive.
My name is not common. I have long ago given up on finding trinkets with my name on it. My name has been misspelled countless times (for events and in print -even when I spell it out). The likelihood of there being a “Hey Jude” or “Jenny from the Block” song with my name is incredibly slim. Growing up, I used to be upset that my name was considered unusual. Even though I have come across people wishing that I had a simpler name, I’ve come to realize that my name suits me and am happy with it now.
Some people have heard of it or of a variant of it while others are up to the challenge of trying something new. Star stickers for those people. 
I’d like to think that my name has a good distribution of consonants and vowels to make phonetic pronunciation easier – but to this day I still get comments such as:
“Do you have a nickname?”
“What kind of name is that?”
“Oh you look so ethnic, where are you from? ”
“Your English is good!” (I’m not foreign to USA, I was born/raised there)
Person staring blankly, “…What?”
“…I’m not going to remember that, so I’ll call you [something else]”
“SPEAK ENGLISH!” (I hate that, don’t do that)
While I realize that these strange interactions come with the territory of having a name most people don’t hear everyday, it does get tiring at times.
I don’t always feel like giving a detailed explanation to each and every person. I’ll tell you now that while my name doesn’t necessarily mean anything it’s linguistic roots are Greek, I was named after a gypsy, and I was almost named…Jessica…
Nicknames are great, but when a person chooses to give me another person’s name (Marie, Vanessa…) instead of choosing a nickname that portrays a closeness, knowledge and respect for the other person – it’s rude.
I have an assortment of nicknames; I see them as badges earned from fruitful interactions and each one contains special memories of the friendships that have developed. The key to me being that nicknames are earned, not justification for a lack of effort.
The silver lining to having an uncommon name are those responses that I get when I first introduce myself to others. It helps me filter out people I shouldn’t dedicate much time to based on their preconceived notions about me based on just my name. Curiosity is fine, openly being dismissive or rude is not and I still do not see why rudeness towards the unfamiliar is socially acceptable and something I’m expected to tolerate. Such is life I suppose.
The support and acknowledgement that I am more than just my name from friends and family encourages me to improve myself, and their nicknames for me are representative of the bond we share.
So what’s in a name? Like Transformers©, there is more than meets the eye (or ear).
Thanks to Uzomaka‘s story regarding her name for inspiring this post.
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